A Note of Encouragement
I am writing you now to encourage you to continue in the wonderful things you are doing for the church of our Lord. Sometimes we lose sight of the fact that our work for our families is really an investment in the future of the Lord’s church, but I hope you will not. The time you spend making your home a warm and safe space in a hectic world will help your spouse be the leader he needs to be, your children shine and grow as lights of hope and you, yourself, into the warrior of faith and virtue that will carry the plan of God forward.
Perhaps at this moment in time you do not feel like much of a warrior of faith. If only you could see yourself the way I see you. Your potential is only limited by your determination and is not defined by your discouragements. Please remember that God made you in His image and considers you worth the blood of His Son. He does not value us because we do great things for Him. He values us because we are His, just as you love your little ones before they have any chance to prove themselves to you. In spite of–or in some ways because of–the effort you expend to care for and protect, you love them more than yourself. This is the mind of Christ (Phil 2:1-4), and I applaud you for showing it. I pray your daily example of sacrifice will motivate others to do the same.
Whenever you have a season of sadness please remember that “this, too, shall pass.” What will help carry you through those moments is a strong reliance on God’s Word. We can find comfort, purpose and application of God’s timeless principles through meditation, but only by personal study of His Word, itself, will our spirits grow into the better version of ourselves. A wise woman is built with a sure accumulation of what God says as we learn to use it. Do not neglect to read your Bible. Study with groups, but read on your own. You are intelligent and capable of understanding what it says. Tutors are helpful, but all that is needed is careful, prayerful, study. This is your job, and no one else’s.
While your day seems consumed with endless tasks and one pressing need after another, please, please, please do not forget to make the time to feed your soul. The daily tasks matter. Do not avoid them or put them off, because they will only grow into a larger mountain to climb. They are your contribution to the smooth function of your household. These jobs will repeat themselves, but their lasting effect remains in the benefit to your loved ones and the personal satisfaction that you have accomplished something- no matter how small it seems right now. Our lives are built from many small victories.
Be careful about your friends. I know you have chosen them carefully. I know they share your values and love Our Lord. I also know that they share your youth. It is easy to confuse what makes sense to you with wisdom that is tested over time and scope. Having someone who understands how you feel can be a comfort, but it can also be a crutch. Dwelling on what troubles you without a clear plan to remedy it can increase your dissatisfaction more than make it go away. Look for solutions, not just someone to have sympathy. Keep your friends, but include a few older women in that circle. Ask them what they think. Listen to their answers. Really listen. That does not mean they will always be right, but age and experience will often see hidden pitfalls and long-term effects. As for friends, do not pit any of them against your spouse. He is your first and best friend. No matter how much you enjoy spending time with other women do not make it more or more important than the chance to spend time with him. That is also an investment in your future. Invest your time wisely. You know how limited it is. It is a precious commodity that you cannot retrieve. All you can do is show what you have traded for it.
Above all I beg you not to lose your joy. No matter how much you do for your family, they do not need a lifeless and sour housekeeper who makes them feel guilty for all that is done. Keep your perspective. Remember the long-game. Hold on to the love you have for them. And Smile. Let them see the reason you serve. Every act is also an opportunity to show them grace and endurance.
Your loving friend,
“We do not loose heart … our inner man is being renewed day by day…” 2 Cor 4:16-18